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The Kraken Wakes...

Saturday, 17 September 2011

You looking at me?
The Kraken's a'coming!
Well, of all the bell-ends...Driving to Ava's creche the other day I had to negotiate a road which is reduced to one lane thanks to the cars parked on one side of it. The cars coming at me had priority so, grudgingly, I tucked into a rare space to let 'em pass. And what the fuck do you think happened? The guy behind me overtook me straight into the path of an oncoming van in an effort get home one car-length earlier than usual. Of course, I, The Kraken, made judicious and lengthy use of my horn in order to point out the error of his ways. 
Guess what he did? Stopped his car bang in the middle of the road, got out and ran at my car shrieking. Natch, I did the safest thing I could think of and leapt out of my car hollering like a Kraken with a detached nad. It saw him off mind. And he looked even more fat-handed when he realised that he was stuck in the path of traffic and had to act like some mobile roundabout for the oncomers. 
So if it was you who was driving (although I use that term extremely loosely) a white estate car down Holly Street in Rhydfelin at 3.30 on Thursday 15 September, do us all a favour and shove your gear stick up your arse, will you?

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